Sweet Goodbye's and New Beginnings

I've been laying awake in bed writing you this post in my head. I finally decided to just get up and share it with you-I've been thinking that and that I am pretty sure that coffee I drank at my parent's house was not decaf! (Please forgive me if this post is jumbled or doesn't make much sense!)

I know that lately, I have been incognito as far as this blog thing goes. My life has been on hold these past four weeks. My sister Katie returned home from many months in Oklahoma where her hubby, Theo was doing training for the Air Force. I knew my time with her was limited so I made sure to incorporate whatever she was doing, into my weekly plans. I was afraid to commit to anything without checking with her first. You see, she leaves us tomorrow for Washington state for the next four years. Now, I know that we'll see her between now and then, but the chance to spend time with her, won't come around very often!

These past few weeks, some of my favorite moments with my sister wasn't where we were doing anything big or special. It was the times she'd come spend the afternoon at my house, sitting on my couch talking about everything and nothing at all. It was the times she'd just ride in the car, running errands with me and entertaining my boys while I'd run into the store to grab something. All those nights where she'd stay for dinner and we'd cook together. It was all that "normal" living that we were able to share together that I'll miss the most.

I am almost five years older than Katie. I don't remember the moment so many years ago, where I went from being the older sibling to us both being equals, I just know I'm glad it happened that way! The Lord has blessed me with an amazing, close-knit family. Whenever I have told people about her moving so far away, many people have commented, "How are yall going to do that? Your family is so close to each other!" It always makes me smile when the outside world sees what I feel in my heart.

When I found out they were moving to Washington state...and then a few weeks later when they found out they were expecting their first child, I asked the Lord "Why?" Why take her so far away? Why now, when she is about to have a baby? I looked at all the things I was going to miss, instead of all the opportunities they would have by moving there. The Lord reminded me in His soft, calm way, that His ways are not my ways (Isaiah 55:8) and most importantly, that He has a plan to prosper us and not to harm us and to also give us a hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11). He has a plan for them in Washington, just as He has a plan for me in Georgia. What a sin to want something out of His will! He also reminded me that it is because we are so close, that distance will not change anything. It is because of our love for one another, that we'll be OK.

I think one reason I'm so sad about her leaving, is that I know how hard it is to have children and not be able to share them with the ones you love the most. When I had my first child, I lived very far away from home. I can remember so many things I wanted to share with them, but wasn't able to. Her first steps, her first word, the cute look in her eye when she was about to do something she knew she wasn't supposed to do. I can remember how much it hurt not to be able to share all those tiny moments with them. One year for Christmas, my parents and my brothers and sisters made a cassette tape. They recorded themselves reading various stories. Randol would listen along and turn the page when my mom hit the piano key on the tape! Just letting her listen to their voices made them come alive in a way that photographs cannot do. I can remember being in the living room and hearing that tape play from down the hallway. It made it feel like they were there, in my house with me. At that time, I never thought that one day I'd live within a hop, skip and a jump from not only my own parents, but my husbands parents too. I never thought that one day-it might be my voice on the tape recorder, reading to my little nieces and nephews who are very far away. I am so glad we have things like email, cell phones, web cameras and airplanes. How did all those families do it in the olden days when they would say goodbye forever and ride off in the wagon train across the wild west? I cannot even imagine!

So tomorrow morning, I will head on over to my mom's house and hug Katie's neck for the last time until Christmas. The next time I see her, she will be a mommy-how hard that is to believe! And as I wave to them, as they turn the corner out of sight, I will count my blessings that the Lord has given me such a sister...such a friend.