Slow Fade

It all started out so simply, but I guess that's how most stories go.

There once was a christian man. He was a deacon and leader in his church. He lead Sunday School every week and always held hands with his wife. He treated his children with the most love and care that other kids wished he was their dad. He looked like he had it all together...

After a long morning working across from his secretary, his eyes kept trailing to her piercing green eyes. He couldn't help but notice the curl of blond hair that kept brushing her neck. He tried to look at the picture of his wife, that was sitting on his desk and to focus only on the task at hand.

Many days later, it only took one brush of the hand to help her out of a chair and he felt the fireworks spark between them. It didn't take long...until he slowly faded away...

She was raised in the church, had a great christian family. She'd become a Christan at a young age and was a leader in her youth group. She started dating his great guy. He made her feel in a way she'd never felt before. It started out so innocently. One day his hand accidentally crept a little farther up her leg than it should. Days later, sitting in the back of his truck, feeling his lips brush her neck, she could feel a tingle up her back that she'd never experienced before. It didn't take long...until she slowly faded away...


He was a sophomore in college and had never had a drink before. His friends convinced him to go to one party on New Year's Eve. "What will one party hurt?" he asked himself. As all of his friends had a beer to bring in the new year, he decided one drink couldn't hurt. It didn't take long...until he slowly faded away...

Weeks after she'd given birth to her third child, she could not shake the extra baby weight. She had gone to the gym, put herself on a strict diet and nothing was working. One week she got sick and lost 8 pounds and she began to think, maybe being sick was the trick to losing weight. After dinner one night she went to the bathroom, stuck her finger down her throat and realized that it didn't matter anymore what she had just eaten. It didn't take long...until she slowly faded away...

He had a nagging pain in his back. The doctor prescribed some really good pain medicine. The stress from work was becoming overwhelming. He started smoking just to take the edge off. When that didn't take away the pain, he started taking one more pain pill and then another and it didn't take long...until he slowly faded away...


After a week of sleeping on the couch because her husband was sick, she realized she kind of liked her space that sleeping in two different rooms gave. As weeks and months went by, she spent more time away while he was at home, she went to the book store and took a pottery class. She worked more and stayed at home less. Days would pass with only a few words between them. It didn't take long...until their marriage slowly faded away...

Alcoholics don't become that way over night. Adulterers don't wake up one day and think, "I think I'll cheat on my wife/husband today." People with eating disorders never start out a diet saying, "I hope I become anorexic." People addicted to drugs don't try to become dependant on something other than themselves. Teenagers don't have sex for the first time, hoping they will get pregnant. Marriages don't dissolve in a day and relationships don't crumble in just one moment. It is all the tiny moments in between leading up to the "big" moment that bring us to that point. It only takes one time for you to talk yourself into doing something or that something is "OK" when normally you wouldn't think so. The next time you'll lower your guard even farther and little by little, before you know it, everything you ever stood for or was ever important to you....has slowly faded away...



Slow Fade by Casting Crowns
Be careful little eyes what you see
It's the second glance that ties your hands as darkness pulls the strings
Be careful little feet where you go
For it's the little feet behind you that are sure to follow


It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
It's a slow fade, it's a slow fade

Be careful little ears what you hear
When flattery leads to compromise, the end is always near
Be careful little lips what you say
For empty words and promises lead broken hearts astray


It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day

The journey from your mind to your hands
Is shorter than you're thinking
Be careful if you think you stand
You just might be sinking

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
Daddies never crumble in a day
Families never crumble in a day


Oh be careful little eyes what see
Oh be careful little eyes what you see
For the Father up above is looking down in love
Oh be careful little eyes what you see

Not Me Monday

Welcome to Not Me Monday, the day I share all the things I Most Certainly Did Not Do over the last week! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I was not resentful that I had to spend my three day weekend last week with three sick kids with 102 temperatures, instead of enjoying my husbands time off of work. And I did not feel about two inches tall when he reminded me what a blessing it was that he was off of work to help me.

I did not want to scream and promise that I'd never go back to the pediatricians office. Ever. All this after they prescribed a medicine that has horrible known side effects in children under two-and I was never given a warning before giving it to him, only to have those side effects-effect him and scare me. Half To Death. (see post below for details).

I did not COMPLETELY LOSE IT when my daughter told me at 5 o'clock in the afternoon that the only reason she had just finished her school was because I had made her spend an hour watching the Presidential Inauguration, taking notes and then writing a paragraph. She seemed to have forgotten the two hours she'd wasted that morning doing just a math page. And I was not super surprised at what an amazing job she actually did writing that paragraph.

The next day, I knew I had to change something about the way I was doing things. I was not surprised to see what a difference the rest of my homeschool week was, when we started the day off each morning doing Bible together. I should not have been surprised at the spiritual battles I was facing every day without even realizing it.

I was not the mother who let her two boys open and close the door coming into the orthodontist office or the one letting them play with the water fountain just to pacify them long enough for my daughter to have her retainer checked. And I did not get upset when I left my sons sippy cup at the office, when I was already in a hurry to get home to eat lunch with Wesley, then had to turn around and go back to get it.

When my husband and I went to finally renew our cell phone contract, I was not super proud of myself for getting the free cell phone, versus giving into temptation to buy the phone I wanted, even with him telling me to get the one I wanted. And I did not tell myself over and over, "What is the point of making a budget if you're not going to follow it?"

My husband and I have been watching seasons 1-4 of LOST over the last four months so that we'd be caught up by the premier of season 5. After all that watching, we did not both fall asleep an hour into the two hour long premier! And I did not spend the next afternoon watching what we'd missed on the ABC website!

I did not almost squeal with delight over getting two emails from two different friends from high school who like me, don't have much time to write emails.

I did not take my kids to go play outside just so I could selfishly take pictures of them and then make them come back inside after my camera battery died, for the first time since getting it for Christmas. I'd let them play for over an hour, that was plenty long enough. Maybe? Ya think?

I was not extremely proud of Foster when he came home from speech therapy with three snowmen "It's Mommy, Foster and Will" which he had to say a word for every "Snowball". And I did not get a kick out of him wanting me to take his picture over and over and over again...and then get mad when I took someone else's picture. This coming from the child who will rarely sit still long enough for me to snap any kind of photo.

I did not try to make the most of my husband's night away at a men's conference for our church, by pigging out on junk food and having a girls night with my Randol. I did not want to hug my friend Kim when she invited me over for a play date all day while both our husbands were away. I did not enjoy getting to sit and visit while our kids played and never once had to worry over whether or not my kids would act on their best behavior or try and impress anyone. We did not laugh and share each others motherhood stories and fill each other up with much needed encouragement. And I did not greet Wesley with open arms and enjoy the next hour as he excitedly gave me a recap of his weekend.

I did not wake up at 4 o'clock in the morning, convicted of how much I need to seek His face everyday and quit running on my own agenda and schedule. I was not reminded once again that I am living on His time-not my own and that He has a purpose for every minute that I am on this earth.

I did not begin to ask God what He had up His sleeve when two other mom's told me in one week that they are going to start homeschooling next year. I did not start to seek His will for how I am supposed to help and lead them along the way.

I did not soak up every picture my sister put on Facebook of my precious niece and I did not feel sad at seeing her sweet three month old smile and think of all the things I am missing.

I did not laugh when people came up to me at church saying they didn't realize I was pregnant and that they thought the baby I held in our Christmas production in December was mine...and that I was pregnant. AGAIN! Ahh-what a nightmare!

I did not almost cry when my pastor sang an old hymn acapella last night at the deacon ordination. I was not super proud of seeing Wesley's best friend Seth become ordained and I did not almost cry again (gotta love those pregnancy hormones!) from watching Seth's father bend over and whisper a long prayer in his ear. I did not stay for almost 45 minutes after the service was over (while my kids were in the nursery) just so that I could take pictures. And I did not make a fool of myself in front of our pastor by telling him I love my new Canon 40d so much that I have even dreamt about it! His wife is a professional photographer and was sharing "camera stories", but please-dreams about a camera? What An Idiot! TMI!

It did not make my whole year, when an older friend and mentor came up to me at church on Sunday just to tell me that, "I thought that girl who won Miss America last night must have been pregnant and went to my church because she looks just like you!" I did not almost kiss her!

I did not finally relieve my guilt by bringing dinner to a friend who'd had a baby three months ago and lives right across the street from my house!

And lastly, I did not fall out laughing when my 20 month old crawled up next to me, patted my prego belly and said, "It's a ball!" and then try to look under my shirt for the ball I was hiding. That was quickly followed up by my 3 year old responding, "Silly Will, it's not a ball, it's a baby in mommy's tummy....but Daddy's baby is all gone!"

Stormy Weather?

The LORD is good, a refuge in times of trouble.

He cares for those who trust in him.

Nahum 1:7

Last Thursday morning, I woke up to a very sick and feverish Will. As the days followed, one by one, my other children got sick. There were many times in the middle of the night where I'd rock Will back and forth, waiting for his nose to clear up and to hear his rhythmic breathing that let me know he'd fallen back asleep. I started using this time to pray. The house was quiet, except for an occasional cough from one of the other bedrooms and it was dark in my room except for the small glow of a tiny nightlight. I'd hold my baby boy and pray that he'd feel better and I would thank God that I wasn't sitting at a hospital with a really sick child in my arms. Whenever my kids catch some type of virus, I always think, "It's not cancer or some long term disease, I can handle this!" It's all about perspective!

Monday, we decided to take the kids to see the pediatrician. I am not like a lot of mom's who take their kids to see the doctor at any sign of a runny nose. I usually try and wait things out until I know that good 'ole cough medicine or saline drops aren't helping and then I load up the whole crew and go see what the doc has to say. The doctor prescribed them each an antibiotic and an antihistamine. By the time I left the pharmacy, I'd dropped over $100 bucks in co pays and med's, but I was hopeful that things were going to get better and that my children would be back to their cheerful selves in no time. My husband reminded me, that is priceless and worth any money we had.

After 20 minutes of giving the kids their new medicine, Will went from playing cheerfully with his brother to being ready to pass out from exhaustion, his face became pale and he felt like he had a fever. As I held him in my arms I noticed his breathing was weird. He sounded like he had been running a marathon and was breathing very rapidly. I started to get scared at the sudden change in behavior. After a little while had passed, I felt fear begin to take hold. He had a temp of 102, his breathing would not slow down and he kept moaning, "Mama".

So often as I sit and watch my kids play together or I catch a wink from my husband from across the dinner table, I think, "Does life get any better than this? I am not worthy of the life He has blessed me with." And then I remind myself to soak up every minute because life can change in an instance. It only takes one car wreck, one slippery road, one missed stop sign, one rain storm, one etc...and life as we know it, will forever be altered. I am not trying to be a pessimistic, just remind myself how every moment is precious and not to be taken for granted. I once heard that you are either walking out of a storm, standing, soaking wet in a storm right now or you are about to enter one. It has been a long while since I've had any really stormy weather.

Sitting on that couch, listening to my sons shallow, rapid breathing, I started to wonder, "Was this it, the moment that big, fat raindrops were about to fall?" Tears began to form and trickle down my cheeks as I felt so helpless and afraid. My child was calling my name to help him, but I didn't know how. I began to do the only thing I knew how to do. Pray. God was the only One who could help my child. I realized just how much faith and assurance I had put into a bunch of man-made medication. I had forgotten to trust the One who could really heal him.

After calling the doctor and finding out that a lot of children have that same reaction to the medicine, I still did not feel any better until his breathing returned to normal (6 hours after I'd given him the medicine!) and his fever went down. We decided that was the last time we'd ever give him that medicine!

So often we live our lives putting our faith in things other than God. We place our faith in people, who no matter how much they love us-will always let us down at some point. We put our faith in our jobs and our paychecks and what we can buy, yet no job is 100% secure and all the things we buy, will be left behind once we are gone. We place our faith in technology and science, yet even those can fail us too. Every been typing an important paper, only to have your hard drive crash? What are you putting your trust in today? I so often put my trust in myself; I can do it, I can handle it, I can fix it. Not because I think I'm super special or super human, it's just my nature to "do, do, do" that I often forget until I'm all burned out, to ask for help.

The same God who parted the Red Sea so Moses and the Israelites could walk across on dry ground and the same God who raised Jesus from the dead three days after He was buried-is the same God who loves you and desperately wants you to trust Him with all the tiny details of your life. He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow-He WILL NOT FAIL YOU!!!

EVER.

Think about that.

Why are we so stubborn to trust in what we can see, instead of having the faith to trust in the One who made us and who even has power over the oceans and the lightening bolts?

Those who trust in the LORD are like Mount Zion,

which cannot be shaken but endures forever.
As the mountains surround Jerusalem,

so the LORD surrounds his people both now and forevermore.

Psalm 125:1-2

Not Me Monday

Every week my friend Shannon does Not Me Monday. She's hilarious-you should check it out at http://butterflies-and-daisies.blogspot.com/ It is basically a comedic summary of all the things that you would never do over the past week. She is much funnier and smarter than I, but I thought I'd give it a try.

So..what did I not do again the last seven days...lets see...I did not almost postpone starting school, last Monday, just so I could sleep in another ten minutes. I did not want to jump up and down with excitement when I got to return to my Ladies Bible study after being on break for two months. And I did not tell my friend Victoria, "This is my only break from my children~that's the main reason I'm always early!"

I did not lose my patience when in the five minutes it took me to brush my teeth, I found my 19 month old with a chair pushed up to the washer, pulling soaking wet clothes out and dropping them to the floor. And I did not raise my voice, when I saw that he looked like I had I given him a bath. With His Clothes On. No Not Me!

I did not remind myself "that your body is supposed to get bigger," 4,000 times as I pulled on maternity jeans for the first time only to find-They Actually Fit. I knew the day would come when I could only fit into maternity clothes-I just wasn't prepared when Today IS THAT Day.

I did not go home and want to spank my child after his speech therapist told me he crawled under the table and said, "No!" when she asked him to say a bunch of "P" words. And I did not lose my temper in Sam's when my children pointed to anything and everything saying, "Mama, Mama, buy that!" and then cry when I turned the aisle without it in our cart. Later that night, I did not smile as we ate dinner by candle light because my poor husband had a migraine (the smile was for the candle, NOT the migraine).

I did not want to pitch a fit like a three year old, when my husband had to work all afternoon on Saturday while I tried as best I could, to keep the children quiet. My heart did not melt when my 3 year old brought me a dandelion and then stood there long enough for me to take his picture. Later that night, I did not ask God to "Bless this food to the nourishment of our bodies" before taking a big fat bite of my Burger King cheeseburger; then thanked Him for not having to cook dinner.

I did not almost cry when I made our new 2009 Budget and saw that despite cutting back On Everything, not even Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover could get us out of $140,000 worth of school loans, Any Time Soon. And I did not laugh when I saw the look in my daughters eyes when I told her "No more Cheetos's for A Long, Long time!"

I did not almost call De Fax on my husband when him and our boys got riled up in a game that involved hitting each other-As Hard As They Could-all while laughing hysterically the whole time. And I did not scowl as he told me, "Marion, that's how boys play!"

And lastly, on Sunday night while enjoying a great dinner with Wesley's parents at Jason's Deli, Foster had to go potty. Wesley kindly took him. Then He Had To Go Again. My Turn. I did not use my Supersonic vision to see all the germs crawling around on his hands as he held on to the public toilet for dear life, in a effort not to fall in. After standing there for twenty minutes, I did not think of my yummy Chicken Alfredo getting ice cold, as I stood there talking about light fixtures with a three year old. I did not proceed to scrub his little hands until they were almost red to make sure all the germs were gone and I did not want to crawl in a hole and die of embarrassment as he shouted Across The Whole Restaurant, "DADDY, I WENT POOP!" for all to hear.

And I did not just spend the only time I had to take a nap today, writing this post...

Ahh...I truly love my life and all the blessings children bring! I know a day will come when they are all grown up and I'll miss these days and all the adventures they bring! This was a great reminder to laugh in the midst of my daily struggles. It's all about perspective right?!?

What's in a Name Anyway?

"What's in a name?

That which we call a rose

By any other name would smell as sweet."

Romeo and Juliet (II, ii, 1-2)

Lately my husband and I have been discussing baby names. To name a child is no easy task, especially when you and your spouse don't have many names you both like! What a responsibility! You are choosing the word that will become that person's identity forever. It will be the word that will be on a birth certificate, possibly a passport; maybe it will be in the local paper for some great achievement. It will be written in genealogy records for the end of time. More importantly, I pray that they will one day accept Christ as their personal Saviour and that name will be written in the Book of Life for all eternity.

I started thinking of all of God's names. He has so many in the Bible that He gives us to remind us of an event or of a characteristic of Him. In the Bible, people were named something, based off of what the name meant. I often wonder what name He would give me, based off of its meaning. Would my name mean "Giving of Self" or "Selfish"; "Loving" or "Prideful"? When the Lord looks down from the heavens, searching for those whose hearts are fully committed to Him-am I found worthy enough, committed enough for Him to choose my heart to strengthen?( 2 Chronicles 16:9a) I would love for my heavenly name to mean "Strengthened by the Lord" or "The Lord's Servant".

When God looks down from the heavens, He doesn't see your new haircut and your pretty red shirt. He doesn't see a face covered in makeup with glossy lips. He sees you, to the core, no covering it up...and He loves you anyway, despite yourself. I encourage you to take a look inside your heart and see what you find. The best way I know what all is going on in there, is by what comes out in my daily routine. Am I angry or bitter or jealous about something? Am I losing my temper or getting frustrated too easily? Those are the days and the moments I wish He wasn't looking! Those are the times I know I need to stop and pray and get filled with Him, and not myself.

So what is in a name really? I try not to think of the big responsibility or it really is overwhelming. By April, I trust that we'll have at least one boy name and one girl name and hopefully we will still like those names when we meet this little one who likes to kick me every night!

Such Anticipation!

The week before Christmas, everyday my children would ask, "How many more days Mommy?" with excitement in their eyes. They anticipated Christmas morning just like so many other children across the globe. They would gaze up at the Christmas lights and shake their presents, dreaming of what was in them.

I started my shopping the beginning of November, buying a few things here and there. There were countless nights that I would leave Wesley at home with the kids after dinner to go shopping. I spent more time stuck in traffic, looking for parking places and waiting in lines. That's not including the countless time spent online shopping and comparing prices amongst retailers. I had my list and was always checking it twice to make sure I hadn't forgotten anything. We spent many hours in the attic getting down all the decorations; there's the Christmas tree filled with ornaments and flashing colored lights. The village, lit up along the entertainment center with the little ceramic cars and people. It is our own "Lambertusville" in our living room! And of course there is the nativity along the mantle, a focal point to remind us of the true meaning of the season. In addition to decorating and buying gifts, there is the addressing of Christmas cards and runs to the post office; the endless Christmas parties and making of goodies for neighbors and friends.

So much time put into just one day, into one season; so much expectation for just one morning. There was so much planning and coordinating of schedules to make sure we could see all our family members in one day. Then there is all the after "Christmas planning"; of Christmas dinner and desserts. And lastly, finding time to put away all the decorations and gifts from that one morning.

When it's not Christmas time, so many of us live our lives working Monday through Friday, keeping our eyes focused on the weekend. Once the weekend comes, it is over and we're stuck back in the weekly anticipation of our two day weekend. Anticipation can be a good thing. It gives us drive and a goal to reach for. So often it is what causes that anticipation that can be our downfall. It is easy to become focused on buying gifts and filling the house with lights, that we forget the tiny baby that laid in a manger. Our focus is on earthly things and we forget to look for the things we cannot see.

My question to you today is, what are you anticipating now that the holidays are over? What are you looking forward to with excitement and joy? Jesus tells us in His word, that we are to anticipate His return. He lovingly says that He will come back one day and it is our job to keep our eyes opened, looking for Him. In the book of Mark, Jesus says,

"No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. Be on guard! Be alert! You do not know when that time will come. It's like a man going away: He leaves his house and puts his servants in charge, each with his assigned task, and tells the one at the door to keep watch. "Therefore keep watch because you do not know when the owner of the house will come back—whether in the evening, or at midnight, or when the rooster crows, or at dawn. If he comes suddenly, do not let him find you sleeping. What I say to you, I say to everyone: 'Watch!' " Mark 13:32-37

Are you keeping watch today? Are you aware of what God wants you to do or are you too busy living 9 to 5, to focus on anything else? If you are a child of God, you are a servant of His. You are to be standing at the door keeping watch for His return. That's not to say you're not supposed to live your life, just make sure you are living it with His purposes in mind. It is so easy to slip, to let one day go by without reading His word or even praying, except to maybe thank Him for a meal. Before you know it, that one day turns into a week and then a month and then a year goes by. Suddenly you are living your life on your own and not in His will. I urge to make today a better day. Start fresh on examining how you live your life. Ask Him what He wants you to do differently and I assure you, He will tell you in some form or fashion.

Don't wait, don't hesitate, He could be returning at any moment or any time. There is not a second to spare! I pray that you will learn to anticipate His return, just as children anticipate Christmas morning. With as much preparation and planning and time spent into making one Christmas morning special, do the same for Him. It's a new day, a new year and so much can happen if God's people would obediently look to Him and quit being idle in the things of this world.

They Really Lived

Tomorrow is the Christmas show at our church. I am playing the role of Mary, Wesley is Joseph and Randol is the Bethlehem star. I don't say any lines or have to do any real acting, but I cannot stop thinking about the kind of woman Mary was. I may only be wearing a blue robe and holding a baby, but I can't help but feel unworthy to even do that.

So often when I think of Jesus, I think of the "Man Jesus"; the one who healed people and walked for miles, the one who ended up dying on a cross and being whipped and beaten to the point of non recognition. I forget that that same man, started out as a baby and that baby had a mother. She felt him kick within her womb just as I feel my own child doing in my womb right now. She felt the labor pains and was overwhelmed with love when she finally got to look upon that sweet face that she'd been dreaming about for so many months. We live in a day and age of germ killing agents. As I think of her placing her newborn baby in a feeding trough, I am reminded that there were no antibacterial wipes or bleach or Lysol to wipe it down with. This child didn't have a "going home from the hospital" outfit. He was dressed in a simple piece of cloth to keep warm.

Last night as we practiced for the play, the kings came one by one bearing their gifts. I thought about how proud I am of my own children when they do something and I get to go and share it with someone else. There Mary was, holding this infant and shepherd's came, traveling by foot just to see her tiny baby. Then once they arrived, they knelt down and worshipped Him. The kings traveled for possibly three years just to find Him. I wonder what that felt like. She had to of known that she was not holding just some ordinary baby, she truly was holding the Savior of the world.

What was it was like day to day to live her life? She was young and this was her first child. I wonder if she had someone there to show her how to change baby Jesus' diaper and what did they do back then without gas drops and baby wipes? I wonder how often He kept her awake crying at night or how many times He spit up on her as she was about to go visit a friend. This man we call Jesus, was once a baby. He toddled around at his parents feet and helped His earthly father in his workshop. He played games with his siblings and told them stories. He grew to a teenager and got hair on His face and under His arms. His voice changed and His muscles got more defined. Mary had no choice but to sit and watch her baby boy become a man.

Christmas is the beginning of not just Jesus' story here on earth, but of our story in heaven with Him. That very night that the angels came and God placed that bright star in the sky, it was the beginning of our salvation. It was the beginning of our story. If God had never sent Jesus, then He never could have died for you and for me, to take our sins away. "For God so loved the world that He sent His one and only son and whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have everlasting life." (John 3:16). Think of how different our lives would be if we still had to sacrifice animals to atone for our sin. How hopeless I'd feel if I had to wait for God to send a prophet to tell me His will or if I had to rely on a priest to go to God for me. We take for granted the privilege that we can approach the throne of grace with confidence-anytime we want. We don't have to wait on a person or an event, we only have to cry out and He will hear us.

I hope that as you begin this Christmas season, that you will not forget that tiny baby who laid in a manger or of the mother who carried Him in her womb. Don't forget, His earthly father who helped to raise him. When you are in a store and you pass by a nativity scene in a box, remember that those people really lived. There really was a baby and shepherds and a manger.
And there really is a God in the heavens who loves us enough to sacrifice His One and Only just for you and for me. That is what Christmas is really all about.

I invite you to come see

On This Very Night

Morningside Baptist Church

Columbus, Georgia

Saturday, December 6 at 7:00 p.m.

Sunday, December 7 at 5:00 p.m.

The show lasts about an hour and

there is childcare for children 4 and under.

A Tribute to My Man Part 2

Last year on Welsey's birthday, I posted a few fun facts about him. It was so popular, that to commemorate his birthday today, I thought I'd do it again. I tried not to repeat any from last year. If you missed it, you can check it out at http://oneofhisown.blogspot.com/2007/12/tribute-to-my-man.html .

Hope you enjoy and learn something new about my Wesley!

1. He used to have a contest with his college buddies over who could eat a sack full of Krystal's the fastest.

2. He once ate a whole hot dog in one bite.

3. He also ate a whole taco in one bite (what is it with college guys and food competitions :-)

4. If we are ever at your house and you see him sitting in the kitchen, it's not because he's not being sociable, it's because there's probably a ceiling fan on in the living room and they tend to give him migraines.

5. His favorite television series is Lost.

6. He always knew he wanted a lots of children and God willing, lots of grandchildren.

7. He is not squirmish around babies and in fact, loves playing with their toes or "tootsies" as he calls them.

8. He is currently the 2nd to youngest attorney in the DA's Office.

9. He is currently the 2nd to youngest deacon in our church.

10. His favorite donut is a Duncan Donut Blueberry donut hole.

11. The only bone he has ever broken is his collar bone. It was at the end of his kindergarten year and he decided to be a dare devil and jump off the top of the slide. He paid the consequences all summer long when he couldn't go swimming.

12. The one thing he absolutely hates to drink is water!

13. He does not like any type of oriental food.

14. He loves Godfather's pizza so much, that we drove an hour last summer when we were on vacation, to eat at the closest restaurant! The smile on his face and memories we made, made it all worth it!

15. He loves to play old arcade games.

16. The only things he can cook are Ramen noodles, hot dogs and PB & J.

17. If he ever went on a date and really didn't like the girl too much, his famous last words would be, "I'll call you sometime!" Thankfully I never heard those words personally!

18. He may not be "outdoorsy" in the sense of wanting to go hunting or fishing, but every year when the leaves start to change and the air gets a little cooler, he starts saying, "Lets go to the woods!" He loves the peacefulness of it.

19. He hiked all 23 miles of the Pine Mountain Trail two weeks ago!

20. He is a firm believer that every one of our children should have some silly nick name. And I don't get to help choose.

21. He loves surprises and never wants to find out what we are having when I'm pregnant. Sometimes I'll give in and wait.

22. He is a homebody. He'd love nothing more than to stay at home on the weekends and sit around watching football or playing with the kids. I'm the opposite, always ready to go somewhere and can only sit for a little while!

23. He correctly guessed that we were going to have a boy with our last two pregnancy's. He says this one's a boy too, will he keep his streak going or finally be wrong?

24. He always tells Randol that she's not allowed to get married until she's 65 years old!

25. He cannot stand cold weather.

26. As a joke, he has different levels in how people cook, he says the top level (which signifies that you are a really good cook, or you made a really good meal) is the "Grandmother status". He'll eat just about anything and always tells me thank you for cooking, but I always know I cooked a really good meal when he says, "Wow Marion, you hit Grandmother status!"

27. Every year he goes Christmas shopping for me in less than three hours and buys every single one of my presents. He is a man on a mission!

28. Randol calls him the Principal when it comes to school stuff. He is in charge of her book reports and some of her history.

29. He is not a yard person. He gets so excited when the grass starts to turn brown and fall sets in because then he won't have to cut the grass.

30. He's not a big chocolate lover, but his favorite chocolate candy is Crunch bars, Hershey's with Almonds and Kit Kat.

31. I asked our 9 year old if she had any fun facts she'd want to share about her Daddy. She said, "He's the best dad in the world! He tickles us and chases us and he's really sweet to my mom. Oh, and he's also really funny!"

I don't think I could've said it any better!

Sittin' In My Abba's Lap

For the last three years, we have been blessed to get a professional picture of our family at extremely discounted prices. There is a well known photographer in town who takes all the homeschoolers pictures and then makes a year book for them (of the school aged children). I know when I look back on these pictures it will bring a smile to my face as I see how fast my family is changing.

When your children are young, they go through stages that you think will never end and then before you know it, the stage has passed and they are into something else. So often you don't even realize the change has occurred. I once read an article that talked about how as parents, we write down all our children's "firsts"; their first steps, their first tooth, their first school dance, etc. yet, we never really notice all the "lasts". When was the last time you brushed their teeth or read them a story. As they get older and move out of the house, when was the last time you gave them a hug, asked about their day or wrote them a letter. Your role as a parent may change as you go from changing their diapers to releasing them out into the world, but the love you have for them never changes. As Welsey's mom tells him, "You're still my baby!" My friend Victoria, who is also the mother of five children always says, "Motherhood is not for wimps!" and I'd have to agree. It is so much fun to watch your children grow and learn new things. It is also heartbreaking when you have to see them go their own way and make mistakes. It is our job as parents to teach them in the way they should go, but it is up to them which road they will ultimately choose.

So often we forget that God is more than just the creator of heaven and earth, He is also our Abba! Romans 8:15b-16 says And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. He is our Daddy! What a privilege to be able to call Him that!

He knows every first you ever had. The first time you asked Him to be your Lord and Savior, the first time you told someone about Him, the first time you had faith to follow His will. He is watching you right now to see which road you will choose. Not to see if you'll mess up, but so that He can cheer you on and help you, when you follow His will.

In those times when you have left His side, He has grieved for you. I love it when Jesus says in Matthew 23:37b, "O Jerusalem, Jerusalem...how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing." I love that picture of Him protecting His children and loving us just as a mother hen would do with her baby chicks. I wonder how many times I have broken His heart by not letting Him. Thankfully, just like the when the Prodigal son's father threw a huge party with the best food and wine when his lost son finally came home, our Abba also celebrated when I came home to Him once again.

Never forget that you have a Heavenly Daddy who loves you and adores you very much. He longs to spend time with you and to heal your hurts. He longs for you to crawl up into His lap so He can sing you a lullaby. One of my favorite verses in the Bible is Zephaniah 3:17, The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing. When is the last time you crawled up into your Abba's lap? Don't put it off for another second! He longs to hold you in His arms and tell you He loves you.

The first picture is from 2006, when Randol was in 2nd grade and Foster just turned 1. The second is in 2007, Randol is in 3rd grade, Foster just turned 2, Will is 5 months old. I'm sure you guess the last family picture, it's from this year, 2008, where Randol is in 4th grade, Foster is 3 and Will is 17 months. Foster would not cooperate this year to get his photo taken, that is why there is not one of him by himself! I'll take what I can get, when they are his age! It is neat to think that next year we'll have another little one in our family photo!

My Heart

In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps.

Proverbs 16:9

So...tomorrow is the day we've been waiting for, and dreading all at the same time, for months now. What people do tomorrow by checking a tiny box, will help decide America's fate for the next four years. I have been anticipating this day for so long. My husband and I have talked about it so many times, I wouldn't be able to count.


My husband works in a position that is controlled by elected officials, so while our eyes have been on the Presidential election (which is a much bigger deal), our hearts have also kept a close eye on our local candidates that are running for election/re-election. Many, many months ago, when I started praying for the upcoming election, I would pray for certain candidates to be re-elected/elected. I would plead with God to elect or re-elect certain people. One morning, I felt the Lord asking me if I could tell Him the future. Did I know what would happen if my prayers were answered and certain people were in office? I came to realize that my prayers were all wrong. I should be not be praying with an attitude of almost telling God who to put in these elected positions, I should instead pray for His will to be done, no matter what that means. His will is so much better than what my limited knowledge knows right now, in this moment. He knows the future and what is best for me and my family and more importantly, for this great nation.


My heart has been prayerful and my eyes continue to look towards heaven as I wait to see what His will is. No poll can tell me the future, and no wishing can change it, but I do have control over my heart. I can create in me a clean heart, free of bitterness and worry and stress. Worrying over what happens tomorrow cannot change what will be.


Yesterday, at the end of the church service, I felt so convicted of my own sin. I have been angry at certain people that I should be reaching out to in love. I have been bitter over certain situations I could not change. I have been short tempered and not getting things done that I knew I should do. I made excuse after excuse for myself, without even realizing I was making them. So often we forget that small things like worry or resentment or anger are a sin. A sin is anything that separates you from God. Anything. I sang the offertory hymn and gave it all away. I was washed in the blood of the Lamb, once more. I was ready to wake up and start anew; beginning each day with hope and anticipation for what He'll do in my life and for what plans He has for me. I cannot be in His will or be used by Him, if I am living my life on my own, doing my own thing.


I encourage you to ask Him what is separating you from Him today. Once He shows you, ask for forgiveness and be free from the burden you have been carrying. It is that easy, all you have to do is ask and He promises in His word that He will take your sins and make you as white as snow (Isaiah 1:18). Jesus once said, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." (Matthew 11:28-29). Just give it to Him and find the peace you are searching for.


In Psalms 18:31-32 it says, "For who is God besides the LORD ? And who is the Rock except our God? It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect." Start tomorrow standing on the Rock of your salvation and leaning on His strength and no matter what happens with this election, He will make your ways perfect. He is still on the throne as the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords. How I pray that I will remember to not put my trust in anything but the name of the Lord my God.


Last thing, I encourage you to never cease praying for this country and for His will in your life. James 5:16b, which is one of my favorite verses, says"The prayers of a righteous man is powerful and effective." Your prayers do count and they do matter to the Father of the Heavenly lights!

Some trust in chariots and some in horses,

but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.

Psalms 20:7

Happy Halloween!

Still the Same

Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to the king, "O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and He will rescue us from your hand, O King. But even if He does not, we want you to know, O King, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up."

Daniel 3:16-18

The past month I have been studying the major prophets in the Bible. I have been astounded at their faith and their courage. I want to be as brave and as willing to follow God, no matter where He leads or what He commands. These men suffered greatly-physically and emotionally and sacrificed everything at times for the One who had sent them. A favorite story of mine, is about the three men mentioned above. The great and mighty King Nebuchadnezzar had made a statue nine feet wide and ninety feet tall and commanded everyone in his kingdom to bow before it whenever he played the "signal", which was made up of music. Imagine how eerie that must have sounded and been to watch if you were a follower of the One True God. The music sounds and everyone, everywhere stops what they were doing, no matter how important or mundane, to bow before this image. The penalty for not following the command was death by a burning furnace. Not my idea of a fun way to go! Some of the kings messengers saw that these three men did not bow at the signal. When they told the king, he was furious! The king decided to be nice-he'd give Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego one more chance to bow before the image before he killed them; yet, they didn't need one more chance, their minds were made up. They knew that no matter how powerful and mighty this great king was-their God was so much more powerful and mightier. God never said He would save them, He never said that He was going to use these men of faith to open the kings eyes to the One True God. All Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego knew, was that they could not and would not bow before anything that was less than their God. They were willing to die than to obey such an order. I love how they acknowledge God's mighty power to save them, but said that even if it wasn't His will to save their lives, they still would not bow down to the kings golden idol. What faith that is!

The end of the story, as most of you know, is the king was so furious at them that he made the furnace seven times hotter than normal. It was so hot that it killed the strong soldiers when they put Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego into the furnace! After they were thrown in the furnace, the king was astounded to see not three men walking around-but four. An angel of the Lord was with them in those hot flames. When the king called them to come out, there was not a burn mark on their robes or bodies, a singed hair on their heads and most impressive of all, they didn't even smell like smoke! What a miracle! The king promoted them and made a decree that everyone in the kingdom must follow their God!

Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego stepped out on faith and God met them where they were. What has He called you to do, but fear has kept you from obeying? There are so many unknowns right now with our economy and the upcoming elections. I see people living in fear of what decisions a man may make, that concerns their money and their future. We forget that these are just men and women, like King Nebuchadnezzar, but they are nothing compared to the One True God. No matter what happens next Tuesday, He is still on the throne and He will be no less powerful than He was the day before. The Bible promises us that He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. The same God who saved three men in a burning furnace and even rescued them from smelly clothes, is the same God who listens to your prayers and sees your heart today. Live your life like they did, in courage and in faith. We are not here in vain, God has a plan for each and every one of us. There is a reason you woke up this morning to start another day. Do you know what it is? Ask Him to open the eyes of your heart-and you will see Him.

Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me,

and I will listen to you.

You will seek me and find me

when you seek me with all your heart.

Jeremiah 29:12-13

The Broken Bottle

"My people have committed two sins:
They have forsaken me,
the spring of living water,
and have dug their own cisterns,
broken cisterns that cannot hold water."
Jeremiah 2:13

My daughter used to have this plastic, pink cup that had a picture of Sleeping Beauty on it. It soon became her favorite glass and she would drink out of it at every meal. One day her brother dropped it as he was "helping" clear the table. That cup got a crack in the bottom and now the water would drip through it. It was not fixable and I finally had to throw it away.

In Jeremiah, God told the Israelites that the root of their sin came down to two things:
1. They had turned from God and
2. As a result, they were trying to find their own way.
God tells them their lives were like cisterns that were broken and could not hold water. What good is a water bottle if it can't hold water? Their lives had become empty and broken and no longer usable for the kingdom of God. The sad thing is, they weren't always like that.

Jeremiah 2:2, says "I remember the devotion of your youth, how as a bride you loved me and followed me through the desert, through a land not sown."
I remember when I was dating my now husband. He was in his last year of law school and lived an hour and a half away. We would stay up talking on the phone so long that many times I'd hear my dad waking up to go to work, before I realized midnight had come and gone and it was now 6 in the morning! There was nothing I wouldn't do for him, no mountain I wouldn't climb or request that was too great.

That is how the Israelites were with God. They crossed the desert and followed Him in faith and love to the land unknown. Do you remember when you first asked Jesus into your heart? If you were like me, you might have been ready to jump on the first plane to Africa to become a missionary or march across the street to tell a stranger how He saved you. All of those things were grand when they happened, but how is your life now?

Are you like the Israelites, going on your own, living your life how you want, without any regard to Him or His purposes for your life? It is so easy to slip, to begin to worry, to try and fix a situation to have the outcome you want, or to want things you cannot have. The enemy can easily tempt you to re prioritize and run out of time to read His word. It is so easy to "follow worthless idols and become worthless ourselves,"(my paraphrase, Jeremiah 2:5b) like the Israelites did. We look to politicians or our spouses or our best friend or the next big promotion or new "thing" to make us feel whole, and to complete us. Before we know it, those things control our thoughts and our actions and our lives become worthless to His kingdom.

Thankfully, He is also the God of forgiveness and mercy and He would love nothing more than to take your shattered life and put the pieces back together again. He fills us with Living water, covering over every hurt, every want and every need. John 4: 13-14 says, "Jesus answered, "...but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." When our lives are lived for Him, we no longer thirst for the things of this world because He completes us. We realize that He is all we really want or need.

God makes a promise to the Israelites, despite their sin. It is a set of well known verses that says, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity." (Jeremiah 29:11-14a)

He promises to bring you back from whatever captivity sin has entrapped your life in. He has a plan for your life, filled with hope and a purpose. Rest in His love, trust in His plan and give Him the shatters of your life so that He can make you whole again.

The Speed of Cyberspace

There have been recent carjackings taking place in our city. One of these instances happened to a women who teaches Sunday School in our department. This really hit home for us. She was blessed to have escaped in her vehicle, but not before two men with bandanna's covering their faces, waved guns at her to coax her to get out of the car. On Sunday morning she shared her story and urged women to be careful driving after 9pm. She told us to remember to use your horn, putting your car in reverse if you can't drive forward, and to try as hard as you can to get away. And to always drive with your doors locked.

On Monday morning, someone else from our department sent out an email warning those she loved, to be careful. This person got her information second hand and like I so often do, got the facts messed up. Unfortunately, there was a quote she wrote by my husband that he never said and that made this fearful situation, sound even worse than it really was.

In one day, this email circulated all throughout our city, reaching Harris County, AFLAC, Synovus, the Tidwell Cancer Center, the Police Department, the District Attorney's office, the local school district and many churches, to name just a few. People got this email not just once, but some as many as three or four times! To top it all off, my husband got a call today from our local newspaper. They are going to write an article about the email and wanted to verify the facts he supposedly said! My hope is that the article will get the facts correct this time and rumors and implications will be put to an end.

Guess how many people were sent the original email? Three people! She sent it to her step mother, her sister in law and her best friend, all of which live in the neighborhood that the almost carjacking took place. From three people, this email was infiltrated everywhere. She had no idea the snowball effect that would come. She was only trying to warn those to be careful and didn't mean to get her facts wrong. Unfortunately for my husband, he had to answer numerous phone calls from people asking questions to the facts of the email. Those who know him, knew he would never tell a lie, but most did not know him. His integrity was put on the line and he had to try and convince people he never said the things in the email.

Three people. That's all it took. I'm not writing to tell you about one person's mistake, because any of us could have easily done the same thing. I learned yesterday just how fast something can go through cyberspace and how dangerous the results can be. Please think before you ever forward an email and if facts just don't sound right-chances are they aren't.

Wordless Wednesday: Will's 1st Haircut!

Beyond Your Wildest Imagination

One month ago, my husband had an intense week at work. He had to get up and leave for work every morning around 6 or 6:30 in the morning. I would get up with him and we'd sip our coffee and hot tea and enjoy the quiet in the darkness of the morning. One particular morning after he'd left, I sat in my living room and did my bible study. That week we were studying the book of Psalms. When I was finished, it was still quiet and my children were still asleep in their beds. The sun was starting to creep over the horizon. Not knowing how much time I had left until my house arose, I turned on the television. I don't normally watch TV in the mornings, unless you count Curious George and Blues Clues! I landed on a show called Adoption Tales. I do not watch these types of shows, but for some reason I was pulled into this story of a precious couple who longed to have a baby, but could not. By the end of the show, when they were able to adopt a sweet baby girl, I was practically jumping up and down in excitement for them! I thought about all the couples I know that are just like the couple in the show. Sweet, precious people whose hearts long to share their love with children of their own. It doesn't seem fair.

I turned off the television, sat in silence and reflected on what I had read about in Psalms that morning. There are so many praises to God for His wondrous creation and for all the things that we so often take for granted in our lives. I closed my eyes and praised the King of Kings for my womb, for the ability to have children. It is something I have taken for granted, seen it even as a burden at some points in my life. I thanked Him for my own sweet children and for a wonderful husband I can share my life with. I felt so overwhelmed by the blessings He has given me. So often living day to day, changing diapers, having little to no adult contact and struggling to buy food to put on the table, I forget that where I am in my life is not a burden-but a privilege and a gift.

About two hours later, the only thing I can call it is the Holy Spirit's discernment, but I got the feeling that I might be pregnant. I took a test and it confirmed what I already knew-we are going to have another baby! I cried out in joy. I knew the Lord had a plan and purpose for this little one He was creating. He loves me and knows me well enough, that He prepared my heart and opened my eyes before revealing the news. Had He not prepared me that morning, I probably would not have cried out in joy! I would have turned it into a pity party-how am I going to provide for another child? How can I homeschool with all these small children at my feet? How will there be room in my house for another baby?

What a wonderful God we serve! He knows what will happen an hour from now and He is always preparing us for what is to come. But we must do our part. How different my day would have been if I hadn't done my Bible study that morning! I could have easily slept in or wasted my free time away on some web site. By opening His word and opening my mind to the Holy Spirit, I was able to hear His message to my heart. I only wish I could remember that lesson everyday! Get up, spend time with Him and your heart will be open to His guidance all day long, sounds so simple doesn't it?

After finding out, I started praying for my husband. He was already having a stressful week at work and I never want to add to his stress. I knew we both wanted one or two more children, but we were wanting to wait about a year or so before trying. He was very adamant about having our almost three year old totally potty trained before adding another child in diapers! I prayed all morning that the Lord would show me when to tell him and how to share with him my news.

He came home for lunch that day, like he usually does. After we were finished eating, our three children were running in circles around our house and my husband would tickle them as they ran by. He grabbed my hand, looked me in the eye and said, "Marion, I am so glad I get to come home to you and the kids everyday for lunch. It makes my day so much better, knowing I have yall to come home too!" I smiled, knew that was God's cue and said, "Well, you want me to tell you a secret?" He got a 'deer caught in the headlights' look on his face and then I said, "You're going to have a fourth blessing to come home to everyday!" After the shock wore off, he wrapped me in his arms and told me how excited he was. Then he proceeded to grab our 16 month old and tell him that he was going to be a big brother! He knew Will could keep our secret!


Tomorrow I go to the doctor for the first time. The funny thing is, I just went the beginning of August for a routine check up and my doctor told me that I probably would not be able to conceive a baby for about a year, due to different reasons! Two weeks later, I took that positive pregnancy test! Just goes to show you that God has a plan that our minds cannot conceive. We can make all the plans in the world, but in the end, His ways will come to pass! How much easier our lives will be if we will only take that time to walk with Him, to look around and praise Him for all the many blessing in our lives. It is so easy to see the cup as half empty instead of half full. Don't miss His best for your life just because you are trying to do things your way, in your timing. His plan is so much greater than your wildest imagination!

"But as for me, I will always have hope; I will praise You more and more.

My mouth will tell of Your righteousness, of Your salvation all day long,

though I know not its measure.

I will come and proclaim Your mighty acts, O Sovereign Lord;

I will proclaim Your righteousness, Yours alone.

Since my youth, O God, You have taught me,

and to this day I declare Your marvelous deeds."

Psalms 71:14-17

Wordless Wednesday

To Revere Him

"The remarkable thing about fearing God,
is when you fear God you fear nothing else,
whereas if you do not fear God,
you fear everything else."
~Oswald Sanders


"Now all has been heard,
here is the conclusion of the matter:
Fear God and keep His commandments,
for this is the whole duty of man."
~Ecclesiastes 12:13


"Grant, O Lord, that I may
live in Your fear,
die in Your favor,
rest in Your peace,
rise in Your power,
and reign in Your glory."
~Archbishop William Laud,
beheaded in 1645

Three Simple Truths

Sooo...it's has indeed been a while, a long while. Thank you to those who emailed to check up on me! To say my life has gotten busy would be an understatement. So many things are going on right now that there are not enough hours in the day to do it all. I'm sure there's not one person reading this who can't sympathize! That's just the way life feels doesn't it? Go, go go.

Last week my family and I took a break from all the going and spent a week at Myrtle Beach. The week leading up to our trip, I was anxious about all the hurricanes that were supposed to head that way. I worried that we would drive the 8 to 9 hours to get there, only to have to turn around and come home. My husband kept telling me that even if we only got one or two days of sunshine, it would be worth the trip and it would be a blessing. I had to make myself take on that attitude. Well, we not only had one or two days, but everyday we were there was full of beautiful sunshine. The neat thing was, when it did rain, it seemed to be at all the perfect times when we were finished at the beach.

There was one late afternoon that I will never forget. We were sitting on the beach and if I looked over my right shoulder, there was blinding sunlight. I couldn't see far, even with sunglasses because it was so bright. Yet, if I looked over my left shoulder, it was blackness. You could see the dark clouds and rain in the distance, moving across the water. We sat there watching the two extremes of nature collide until we saw lightening and heard thunder. I thought to myself, I wonder if this is what it looks like everyday when morning meets night. One extreme leaves as the darkness fades and another starts as the light begins a new day.

Every year at the beach, I seem to have some big "wow" moment with the Lord. It might be an incredible sunrise that I know He placed just for me. It could be a starfish or a sand dollar put right in my path. Whatever it is, I feel chill bumps from the thrill, yet a warmness of His incredible touch. This year even though we did find starfish and many other of God's amazing creatures, I never got those bumps. It was as if I took for granted all those gifts He gave. I sat on the beach one afternoon while my husband and children played in the water. I kicked the soft sand around with my feet and the well known verse popped into my head, "How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you." (Psalms 139:17-18).
I looked at all those infinite grains of sand just at my feet and I couldn't help but ask, "Lord how is it possible to think about me that many times?" It was as if a calm, loving voice whispered into my ear, "Marion, what characteristics of Me did you just teach your daughter?" My mind was brought back to the prior week where in school we discussed how God is Omnipotent (all powerful), Omniscient (all knowing), and lastly, Omnipresent (existing everywhere all at the same time; always present). I had to smile. How could He not think of me when He is always with me? In human terms, you are always aware of what the person next to you is doing.

I couldn't help but examine my own life. How often am I aware of His presence? How often do my thoughts throughout the day go to Him for advice and help? How many things do I miss that He is trying to show me?

This week in my ladies Bible study we are studying the book of Ecclesiastes. This has always been one of my favorite books. It might be because it was the first book of the Bible my husband and I ever studied together. It could be because of the wisdom and the reminder that God wants so much for us to enjoy the life He has given us. Whatever the reason, the last verse of the book just reiterated all I had been feeling. It says, "For God will bring every deed into judgement, including every hidden thing, whether good or evil." (Ecc. 12:14) Basically what that means is, we should live our lives, moment by moment, like we are living in the presence of God...because we are, whether we realize it or not.

There were a few times at the condo where the kids would be fighting or my daughter would be yelling at her brother to stop doing something. I would go and softly say, "Stop talking like that. The lady that lives next door might hear you. Be nice!" My daughter would instantly change her tone of voice and include words like "please" and "thank you". It almost made me laugh! How different we would live our lives if we were not just worried about what the neighbors might overhear, but what God does hear!

He is all knowing, all powerful and always near your side. No problem is too great for Him to fix, no secret can be hidden from Him and you are never, ever alone. What a difference that makes in my life!